Where Should We Beginwith Esther Perel

S3 Episode 4: A Romantic Revival

S3 Episode 4: A Romantic Revival

Overview

In this episode of Where Should We Begin with Esther Perel, we are introduced to a couple whose marriage has been colored by sadness. He, having lost his wife to suicide, enters the union numb and with two grief-stricken children. She arrives to the marriage healed, but having endured deep sexual trauma. The pair, longing to transition from surviving to thriving, share they’ve chosen the word revive to symbolize their common goal for the relationship.In A Romantic Revival, the two achieve a place of deep, mutual vulnerability culminating in her performing for him an act of love and connection.

Thematics

What to listen for in this episode of Where Should We Begin with Esther Perel:

  • The theme of children abandoned by mothers runs through the episode. Can this sense of loss be healed in a relationship? Does it require doing the work prior to becoming a partner?

  • Implicit memories are subconscious recollections that live in our bodies. These memories are often evidenced by the freeze response. Have you physically experienced implicit memories?

  • She’s ready to embrace the delight of life. He is busy confirming no one is dead. Both are ostensibly living, yet which aligns with revival?

  • Finding meaning in life is crucial as it allows us to tolerate the pain. Is it a struggle for you to find meaning when faced with trauma? Does focusing on meaning as an anchor help you find your way through sadness?